Depressed tutors and disillusioned students. Cheating parents and greedy vice chancellors. Welcome to the shadowy world of academia. ------------------------- Meet The Secret Professor: he/she has spoken at university Open Days, sat on committees, guides many through their degrees and spent decades climbing the increasingly greasy career ladder - only to realise that it is all bullshit. In fact, the system is broken at its core. The Secret Professor tells it all. From outdated course structures and campus politics to what tuition fees are really spent on. From 'The Oxford Mafia', identity politics, culture wars and scandal in the #MeToo era to writing papers no one reads and turning ill-equipped lecturers into therapists and sexual health advisors, he/she lifts the lid on the shadowy world of higher education. Within the pages is a deeper truth - that most of us know someone who has gone to university, is studying at one or hopes to do so in future. Yet none of us know what's really going on. Unflinching and thoroughly humorous, this first-hand account provides an insider's narrative on how the founding principles of academia are in decline and why we should all consider what this means for the students of today, tomorrow and the world they will shape.